Once you have children, it takes a ton of effort by others you to keep your birthday from becoming just another chance to worship at the high holy altar of “well damn, when did I get this old?” Most people have a hard time wrapping their minds around the fact that by giving birth to […]

Is there anything more mind-boggling than a toddler? Lord, I hope not. I came up with 500 things about them that are incomprehensible, but I only managed to type up 23 before they found me hiding in my closet. If you have or have had toddlers, I’m sure you can understand…. So here they are: […]

I’ll never forget the night I got the phone call. It’s nearly midnight and I’m trying to get my eight months pregnant body into a comfortable position. My husband comes into the bedroom and asks, “Did you see the email from your mother?” I shake my head no. “She wants you to call her immediately,” […]

When my driver’s license and the elastic in my waistband both expire on the same day, I know I am holding a bag of life’s metaphorical lemons. When I get home and see my year old, still in mint condition, bicycle sitting in the garage I get a glimmer of the proverbial lemonade that everyone […]

I’ve been a reader my entire life. Just ask my mom and she’ll recount the number of times she had to turn off the power to the bathroom to get me and my book out of the bathtub. Or ask my husband and he’ll tell you what it is like to go on vacation with […]

A few weeks ago I told you guys about my amazing friend who has cancer. I’ve decided to continue my funny support by doing a weekly (ok, fine, mostly weekly) Friday Funnies for Cancer. I’ll share some of the funniest things I’ve seen on the interwebs during the week before, feature some special guests with […]

Last week I sat down and wrote this post, with my tongue quite firmly placed in my cheek. Then yesterday I spent EIGHT hours trapped in the metal hull of a speeding 777 with my threenager. My tongue has been removed from my cheek. Sometimes I really hate being right. Forget everything they say about […]

I snort and then bury my head in the pillow. The bed shakes with my half-stifled laughter. Nomad Papa is not amused. “It’s 6am, why are you laughing?” he asks. “My friend just said the funniest thing,” I respond as I wipe the tears from my eyes. He raises his head in concern, looks around […]